Why Are There Children In Need?
Someday, somewhere, someone will find a palatable answer to the question that everyone apparently wants to avoid ...
Examples of real-life experiences:
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “Bad Parents” “And those children without parents?”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “Big Society” “And before Big Society?” “Labour Government owed them money” “And the Trade Unions?” “The what?”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “War” “Too much war, or should we start one?”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “You have to see the bigger picture” “Yep, I see it … there are Children In Need”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “Bad teachers” “Who taught the bad teachers?”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “Thatcher” “Thatcher’s dead” “Great let’s get drunk” “Jus’ kiddin’ ya”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “Just put some money in the bucket” “Sorry, please accept my humble apologies for being so rude”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “I’m a poor pensioner” “By comparison with 50% of the world, you are rich beyond comparison”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “Terry Wogan gets paid £1,300 an hour” “Does he make millions selling arms to war-torn countries?” “How do I know?” “Sorry, just following what seemed to me to be an obvious line of enquiry”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “Because they can’t even be bothered to fix that bear” “So ‘they’ are to blame, but who are ‘they’?” “Yes … no … er … what?” “Boo!” “Argh!”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “Charity provides only temporary care” “You mean like the kiss of life?”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?” “Rich Americans” “There are around 100,000 millionaires in Africa” “You’re being racist” “Sorry, I was not aware of your intolerance towards fools”
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“Why Are There Children In Need?”
“We didn’t start the fire, it was always burning since the world’s been turning” – Billy Joel 1989
(No apologies for the last entry, the blog need a ‘music’ tag :-)
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Legal Disclaimer: None of this is real, we are all one consciousness simply observing itself in a state of eternal transition. In case of all that funny wig stuff, please note that neither my employers, their funders or authority bodies take me too seriously, but do have policies that look good in a scuffle. If it does come down to a bit of 'hey boys hey' then please be advised my lawyer starts every sentence with "Now I ain't no legal expert but ...", and I'm not as hard as I look. These are my words, I choose to speak freely, I'm on the side of the non-agressive, creative young people of Planet Earth. Thank you for your time and consideration, now you are going to comment yeah? dp x